beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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