i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
