I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
