After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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