My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
