Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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