I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
