Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
