you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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