There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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