oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Watching her eat just hurts me
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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