i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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