Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
