Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
