fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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