Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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