My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
My vagina is officially offended.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
