Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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