so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize