I like to think it a success when the cops are called
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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