When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
