Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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