sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
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he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
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Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
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