i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
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I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
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i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I have fence marks all over my body
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
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