She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
