"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize