seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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