i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
it was like eating out sand paper
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
