goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I'm eating all of the evidence.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Less talking, more tequila
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
