I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
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I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
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I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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