As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
