in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Little spoons don't ask big questions
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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