Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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