Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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