Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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