You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize