Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
