margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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