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Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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