Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
