Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
