One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would fuck him just for his dog
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize