man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Randomize
