Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
