New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
