if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize