that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
