Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
