Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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