took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
