Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You can't motorboat a personality
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize
